I know, I know! It’s been a long time! Yes, way too long! But, it seems like blogging is like getting in touch with old friends. I think about it often. I wonder how they are doing. And, the longer I’m away, the harder it is to just come back again! It’s hs been on my mind for awhile to start writing again, but the thought of it has seemed awkward almost to the point of impossible to accomplish. But, here I am! So, obviously not completely impossible. Maybe, since I accomplished the other task, writing doesn’t seem so awkward.
This weekend was my class reunion. So, I saw people I hadn’t seen in 10 or even 15 years! The result- I’m still the same- only my hair is shorter. Is that good or bad? People have convinced me that it’s good- that it means I’m aging well. OK- I’ll take that!
But, here’s the truth. I’m not aging well. This past year I’ve aged 100 years and I feel it. When somebody starts to say “nothing worse can happen”, don’t let them! It’s only a sign- a challenge- a guarantee- that something worse will happen! So, that, I think, is part of my absence from writing- the words were to hard to say- to look at in black and white. On the good side, while talking to my cousin last night, I realizd something else. For awhile, I think I had no need to write. I was too busy talking to people to write anything. I was being comforted, comforting, taking care of everyone else, and they were taking care of me. So, where was the time or the energy or the need to comunicate any more than that?
So, for a quick review of my life in the past year or so, I’ll give you the condensed version.
It started with my husband having heart surgery in December- which I wrote about so I’ll spare you the details. He is doing well now, but still on the road to recovery- it’s a long process back to normal. A month and a week after his surgery, his sister was diagnosed with breast cancer. She lives in the same town as us and since my husband and I got married, we have become pretty close. Not too many days go by that we don’t talk- even before she got sick. So, although it didn’t happen to me, in a close family what happens to one is fely by everyone. Luckily, she’s an amazingly positive person and is doing really well! She’s done with chemo and going 1/3 done with radiation. Sadly, they say things happen in 3’s. And this was the one that has me thrown- there is no real happy ending to this one. Well, I know there is but, it still doesn’t feel like it. My grandma- the person I admired, loved, tried to model my life after- got sick. She got to the point where she needed 24 hour care and so, i spent as much time there as possible- savouring every moment I had left in her presence. And then, the moments were gone. So, I know she was ready, I know she is in a better place and there is the happy ending. But, for me, right now, I am still reeling from the intense loss I feel. She was someone I talked to about anything and everything- she always knew what to say and what to do. Her unconditional love got me through so many things that I would not be who I am today had she not been there to offer it to me. And, last, and hopefully least, my husband is currently unemployed. After working for the same company for 7 years, the economy and company politics has sucessfully made him currentlly without a job. So, hopefully this is the least of my list of things because it will be a short lived “vacation” for him. I’m glad he left there. This gives him a chance the other opportunitied out there. He’s looking at starting his own business and in the meantime has had an interview and has filled out some things online.
The good news is life has gone on. Homeschooling is going well. My son is now taller than me! I should have listed that in my “tradgedies of the past year”! He is still working at a farm and volunteering for Habitat for Humanity. In all of the hard times, the family and friends that have been there have been an amazing thing and I really do feel very blessed!
I guess I’ll end here- enough for one blog- and my husband is anxious for us to leave. We are going to my in-laws for the afternoon. And, I plan to hit the beach since it’s going to be a hot one!
One more great thing going on- Cubs are in 1st place and well on thier way to a world series victory!!!
Tomorrow is Another Day 